Dear Friends

I have received emails asking where I am etc. And I wanted to take sometime to let that out. I never knew I had such friends and I am so glad for it. Right now I am going through my family issues, which is nothing new if you looked at my history. But I am still losing weight and continuing on this journey as my life depends on it. I am sorry I am so distant these days and until I start school I will be the same. I need to get out of here and out of the drama. So until I get my new home on Jan 31 I will not post. I did ace my exams and am in school Jan 31. I hope everyone is well and I look forward to all the blogs I missed. I missed you all.

xoxox
Mrs. Crumpet

M.I.A And bronchitis. Ohh yea

So it has been a while since I have been on here, and my god I miss everyone. Life is going back to normal slowly now, I am back home and going to stay that way. Except for this coming Friday and Saturday for obvious reasons. But it feels good to be back. 


O.k Updates: I have passed my exam in school with flying colors and am waiting for the final verdict for getting into college.


I am and have had a vicious cough for 2 1/2 weeks now. Yea I am soo over coughing but I will get better eventually.


I have done all my x mas shopping, and all have been wrapped, another reason I haven't been home, had go out of town for everything.


I am pretty sure I dropped out of Allans Challenge, but thats due to emailing late and not being around a computer, I will still follow his plan I am on, I cannot blame the man for counting me out when my data came late the past two weeks. poor timing on events. I cant stop my life when I am not home :P but I still support Allan and root for everyone still in. I have lost 12lbs( I am averaging it bc I have had ups and downs) on his plan and am sticking to it.


I hope everyone is doing fantastic, and I am off to catch up on some much missed blogs!!!!


xoxox
Mrs. Crumpet

YEA!!!

So I went out with my mom for lunch today, she had to cancel yesterday  which was fine, and guess what, I got the lunch special, 250 cals, bc I remembered what a serving of meat is and I ate that amount, a cup of soup and salad with ONE tabelspoon of Italian dressing. wooo and of course lots of leftovers bc they give huge portions! 3 portions of turkey and about 2 servings worth of stuffing!! wow to think I used to eat that amount easily. I was stuffed after a serving of soup a bit of salad and the one of turkey!!! I dont feel like I am restricting myself, I just ate until I was full! Sorry I am excited, this was my first time out while watching what I eat and I did it.

I am off to see the counselor now I should have left 2 minutes ago, ohh well.

Hope you guys are all doing good!

xox

Mrs. Crumpet

Oh hell in a hand basket!!!

Woo-hoo! It has begun, Allan's challenge. I am exciting because his math has me losing just over 20 pounds if I do this right. Holy crap yea I am gonna do this. Anyways so me personally I am doing the 1200 Cal a day plan with...wait for it....141 oz of water...so just over a gallon if my math is right. Yea a milk jug of water! Ya know and I wouldn't need this much water if I didn't weigh so much, heh the irony. Ahh well it's not so bad, I have a 1L bottle I use and fill it 4 1/2 times or more if I am thirsty throughout the day and I am good. 

O.k day one, my breakfast came at 350 cals, including coffee with a bit of raw sugar. Now Allan's suggestion for a break down in the pamphlet he sent me was: 300, 100, 300, 50, 450. Now for the most part I will be sticking pretty close to that but I do know that breakfast is about 350 on avg and lunch for me is usually no more than 200 hundred just because I am not as hungry at lunch time and I generally dont have a morning snack. So I figure as long as I pull from his menu stay within my calorie limit and balance it out to meet or be under I should be fine. It's planning. Speakin of which my mum is taking me out to lunch so I am gonna google for menus and nutritional facts since its a major chain it should be out there and plan ahead to make sure I dont F**K up.

I hope everyone in this challenge does awesome and has a great day. I am off to plan my lunch!!!

xox

Mrs.Crumpet

OMG Christmas songs!!!

This will be a short post, I am sticking to my plan of 1800 cals and dropping slowly, feel awesome. I got my x-mas play list up, my neighbors I am sure of it despise me. Ha-Ha I love my x-mas songs. I hope you are having a great day. I have a cold but listening to x-mas music and reading Anne's post and watching the video it doesnt matter my good mood and laughter with alvin and the chipmunks makes my crappy head cold not so bad. I am in a good mood to good peeps and fun music.

xoxo

Victory!!

First of all I would like to thank everyone who reads my blog, it is such a cool feeling, and a shout out to my 2 new followers, hello!!! Also, I want to apologize the past couple days I have been uber busy and havn't read everyones blog updates. I am kinda OCD and its a ritual in the mornings to do so but I have been swamped with stuff. It actually ruins my mornings when I don't get to go through my routine and I get cranky. I know, issues. But I will catch up on all you guys and leave comments as long as I have something to say, somedays I don`t but it doesn't mean I don't read them.


Anyways, Good news, went to the university, my placement test is on Dec 14th!!!! I hope I get in. I am studying like mad, in fact I am going to the library after I finish my coffee and this.Library, study, gym, and come home clean make dinner. I got it all mapped out. Hehe. BTW I am going to school for welding, so I need to score real well in algebra and basic arithmetic. O.K on to the next victory:

While I was in a bigger town than my own, my mum and I went to wal mart, well I bought this x-large fitness jacket, for anything thats remotely fitted or smaller then the avg XL, L or whatever I have to go a size up, meaning normally I would buy a XXL. I bought the XL figuring, by the end of DEC I would fit into it. well I tried it on and lo and behold it fits! Tight fitting but they are supposed to be a bit tighter around you. I was ecstatic, it fits and I could zip it up. A month ago that wouldn't have been able to go around my tummy/boobs at all! I got pictures!

Before, when I pretty much started this

Now, like 2 secs ago in my jacket!!!! I think my face is smaller too.

This one is for shits and giggles and for Allan, tee-hee

Hope you all have a great day!!!


xox
Mrs. Crumpet

Mindless eating and self reflection..

I started to binge mindlessly eat. Heres what I have eating today thus far to start the post off.

• 3 eggs
• 1 cup of coffee
• granola bar
• protein shake
• granola bar
• 10 crackers
• 2 tbsp of Homus
• 40ish chips
• 2 Tbsp of Light Cream cheese
• 1 piece of bread with Cream cheese
• 6 hot wings

That is it so far but when it ended it was about 3pm and I know I will be hungry at dinner time which is around 6pm. This totals out to be 2136 well over my personal caloric idea, and by dinner over the one Allan assigned to me. It will have to be something sensible and light in calories. Now as sick as this sounds I was waiting for a moment like this. I needed to break down my wall and bring up the emotions I just stuffed down with high carbs covered in cream cheese. Heres what I realized after 1.5 hours of making myself be honest:

I am not confident that I can make the progress I need to.

I am afraid I will fail and any and all hard work I put into it won't matter.

I don't know how to really express my anger and frustration with life in general.

When I snap at my boyfriend I am not really mad at him, I am unhappy with myself and feel guilty for taking it out on him, and run to the fridge shortly after.

The bills and figuring out how to make ends meet is sometimes overwhelming, I feel like we are in a hole and the ladder is at the top out of reach some days.

I feel guilty I am on stress leave and going to school soon when I could be working, making more money then I do on government "sick" pay.

Of course now that I have broken all that down, tears snot and tissues litter the desk, what do I do next? Breathe. 1,2,3 and breathe. Lets reframe these thoughts.

There is no reason I cannot reach my fitness goals if I am committed.

I need to remember I am a work in progress, not a failure, and even if I have a bad day I can't take it out on someone else.

The bills will get paid , even though it's not as fast as I would like.

There is no reason to feel guilty about being on stress leave, my doctors feel I need this time. And so do I. I know I need to use the time given so that I can handle stress at work and at home. These next 6 months are to help me heal inside and out.

I may have difficulty expressing anger and frustration now, but it won't always be like that, I will learn.

If it seemed like I was talking to myself, I was, but I wanted to write it down, document this conversation with myself. Remind myself that I can DO this and I have every right to take the time I need to heal and I shouldn't feel guilty about it. I hope your Monday is better, and if you self reflect I hope it helps you on your journey as it is little by little helping mine.

xoxo

Mrs. Crumpet